The Bloggy Blogface!

     On a casual jaunt to the local grocery store for items I probably don't  need  as much as I  want , I came across a startling discovery. Within the empty trenches of a recently-obtained hand basket, I caught glimpse of the above grocery list. This is important! Or, was important at one time or another. They seem like critical items, almost hastily composed. Let's analyze the list, in order - Raisins - this seems so out of place here. The fact it is listed on top of the first item on the first line suggests to me it was a last-minute add.  Fuck, I need raisins! And this folded paper is too small to fit it in! 2lbs ground beef - Two pounds! That's a lot. Well, not really. They must be feeding more than one person. And what kind of ground beef? 90% fat free? All the fats? It's not quite specific, meaning whomever wrote it likely doesn't give a shit. 12 peppers - Twelve! They had better be making this right away, because twelve peppers t...

     "Your leg looks disgusting, Bob" I'm reaching back into the congested bowels of my parent's refrigerator when I hear my mother say these words while staring at my left leg. I know it was my left leg she was staring at, because that is where all of this crap started way back when almost fifteen years ago. Shortly after that day when all of this crap started, I was dipping my ankle into a bowl of ice water. My mother was convinced I had somehow sprained it, even though I wasn't feeling any pain. I believed her. Maybe it's an internal sprain. Maybe it's so internal I can't even feel it. The ice water, aside from freezing the hell out of my ankle and foot, naturally did nothing to remedy the situation. The ankle was considerably swollen, and the rest of the calf wasn't looking much better. I had no idea what was going on, but I didn't have time to worry about any of that. I was getting ready to ship on down to The Pelican State. I chroni...