The other night, I had big dreams I was going to take better control of my awful eating habits.This always begins with emails from my parents. What's interesting is that during their emails, they never mention food. It's a topic that simply never comes up. But, I know what's in their kitchen. I know it's full of packaged nonsense with preservatives and sodium and every possible loaf of bread imaginable, all of it mostly jammed into the refrigerator. My parent's fridge is one of great legend. Friends and lovers are always told amazing tales of the fridge's far-reaching depths of foodstuffs packed to the brim. Unfortunately, it is packed to the brim with utter nonsense. Foods they don't need and loads of dairy products that make my intestines rumble just thinking about it. The fruitless endeavor of trying to get them to change their diets goes in one ear and right out the other. And while I'm not about that packed fridge life, its existence alone reaff...