Netflix stand-up comedy special, or a TED talk? A theatrical introduction, your name voiced by someone else through a loudspeaker, or sung by their charming voice. Arrive onstage through billows of manufactured smoke, maybe rising to the stage deus ex machina style. Wear whatever the hell you want - like denim shorts. A Hawaiian shirt. Leather-looking workout gear. A dress shirt a little too unbuttoned for someone your age. There is wild applause from the completely sold out, cavernous arena or open-air stadium. Most stand, clapping for a solid ninety seconds as if you just saved the world. Greet the raucous crowd by identifying the city you are all in, regardless if many commuted from out of town, yourself included. While greeting the crowd, pace around the stage, maybe clap yourself a little. Look astonished, not humbled. Point into the audience pretending you recognize someone here, or over there, and definitely up there. While pandering, say "yeah" or "w...